Opening up is something that makes me feel insecure in itself – but here goes! Moving around constantly when I was growing up wasn’t easy. I never felt like I fit in: I was short, baby-faced, shy and so average. “Only pretty people stand out,” I would tell myself, so I would just hide away instead of being social and getting to know the people around me.
I was insecure about everything, especially how young I looked. I can’t even count the times I’ve heard, “Really? You don’t look your age.” Frankly, I’ve never looked my age and who knows when I will. Don’t get me wrong, having a baby face comes with a variety of perks: paying the children’s fee at museums and attractions, being able to order the chicken nuggets off the kid’s menu, getting away with things because young people look innocent.
But it’s hard as I never have an edge of intimidation or power. I don’t look like I’m old enough for anything “adult” related and most importantly, I don’t get taken seriously. Anyway, here I am, 22, and while I don’t look it, I’m learning to love it. I’ve been told that when I grow older I’ll appreciate looking young – I found my first wrinkle the other day. What’s most important, is that even with this insecurity, and my attempts at hiding away, I’ve had many, who are now the best of my friends, come and talk to me as a new kid in school. And I value that more than anything.
Sophie Buu is studying Nursing at McGill University, and has lived in Montreal, Simsbury, Wuhan, Zurich, Stuttgart and Seattle. She is director of SynesthAsia, a charity fashion and arts show. You can find her eating pizzas, watching puppy videos, or frosting cupcakes.